“The challenge of our life is to stay open and breathe into it. As with water and air, Spirit will fill any shape it is given or allowed to flow into. So, our sense of identity, who we are, can change many times throughout a lifetime, and sometimes must, but the water and air of life we carry, our portion of Spirit, is indestructible and will fill completely whatever shape we assume in the world” ~ Mark Nepo~
The opportunities that we are invited to create a space for us to either open up to life or shut down. Both are a work of heart but they each hold different effects. The one closes us in and sometimes that is needed to provide a space of safety, where we can shut out all the noise and enter in to a direct communication with the sense of the Divine in our own hearts. We only need to have the wisdom when that shutting out is over and a new season beckons us out of our cave.
The other affords us another wisdom to know when we are too open for our own good and so take in all that does not belong to us. We need this connection to discernment now more than ever because when it is time to open again, how wide our hearts expand will determine how much love we can give and receive.
In Yoga, the breath of life is such an important concept for us to engage in because how we spend our breath determines how far we go in a pose. Every breath is linked with a movement, and if we are not breathing, our movements will be short and stiffening. On the other hand when we take in a deep breath, filling our lungs to their capacity, we then are able to take our bodies to a deeper capacity as well.
Sometimes though, I stay on the fence between these two places, wanting to shut down and then wanting to have an open heart as well. I often stay too long in the shutdown.
When I stay engaged on the fence for too long, i I hold with such a tight grip that though the holding on hurts and wears me down, the fear of the letting go is also known to propel me into pain and then to look at some of the rawness in my emotional makeup. I find that I have to go to prayer and to my best friends to know my deepest insecurities, because when I give them a voice, they speak the truth back to me and remind me of the song on my heart. My TRUE heart. That heart that knows that I’m completely acceptible, I’m deeply loved, and I am ENOUGH. This is what I KNOW when I venture into the truth and let go of the lie.
Unless I receive the invitation to the excavation of what lies below in the inner caverns of who I truly am and what I honestly do deserve, I miss the beautiful opportunities that life and Providence calls me towards. Life will always produce life when it is given in full surrender to the One who knows us well. In this adventure into and out of the darkness, I find that I am held with a greater purpose and passion that what I currently hold. It is where I know that when I become that humble warrior, I see that I am never alone.
” I know the battles you are facing seems so strong. But, to love yourself is enough is the greatest of them all. Just keep on going one step at a time. Your call to duty’s not the end of the line. I’m right there at the end of your rope. You’re not alone.” ~ Teri Undreiner ~