Category Archives: Blog

My musings.

Casting Stones: Yoga & God


I think we all know that Yoga isn’t about the cute colorful clothing, yet, I love cute and colorful clothing, and in my normal everyday life, I wear black and tan as a massage therapist, and when I’m not doing that and wearing THAT, I’m teaching or going to YOGA and I GET to wear something more fun. Something that I or someone else created from an artistic and mindful place. Personal photos : courtesy of Stephanie Moors Photography.

I think most of us knows that Yoga isn’t about taking selfies of poses and putting them on public media sites. Yet, I find it fun to have a photo shoot of me and a Marine/ Cop (who I finally persuaded that yoga isn’t just for girls), and a horse named Bella, or doing poses at The Botanical Gardens or just about anywhere that is different. Is it because I’ve stepped out of Yoga and into EGO? No. It’s because I love Nature and animals and Yoga and I see that the body is art and that poses are inspiring and together, the art of the body and the inspiration often is breathtaking. And what’s not inspiring to see a Veteran or a First Responder doing YOGA? And for YEARS I was ashamed of my own body and expressing myself through my own voice. Yoga and God provided me the freedom to break out and begin to love myself AND my body. Do I need to show it off? No. But I need to express my freedom from that old pattern of shame and slavery.


Yoga has expanded my ability to reflect on my issues concerning these things.
And I’m allowing myself to tear down the walls or at least sit on on top of them.

I think we know that Yoga isn’t about money. Yet, everything in life costs money and I don’t know about you, but it costs me lots of money to be continuing my education for Yoga for trauma victims, TBI victims, First Responders, and whatever else it is I’m called to. And studios have to pay rent. The workman is worthy of his or her hire. You don’t see Doctors doing all their work for free. Well, Yoga teachers offer an amazing service to the WHOLE person, body, soul, and spirit, and it takes money to do that. I wish we could all just give it away, but we can’t. It’s a balance for sure..

Yoga is first and foremost about INTEGRATION of the human being, Non- Judgement, Acceptance, The Yamas and the Niyamas,( ways to live) and it leaves space for each person to search their own hearts and motives, not for others to do so. Why is this? Because no one else lives in YOUR body and YOUR head. Just like every religion, each person has access to have their own relationship with God, and people seek that out for their own particular needs. It’s the same with Yoga. One size fits all but not everyone will like one style or one piece.

As in religion, some people jump in with their WHOLE hearts, selling all they have to serve others and they live on the generosity of others to do so. Other people just give what they can while they live their everyday lives. We wouldn’t expect everyone to follow the same religion would we, or the same exact calling of someone else? It’s the same in Yoga. Yoga is for each person and the relationship they have with it, just like another’s relationship to God is PERSONAL. That means, it’s OK if you disagree with me. It doesn’t have to separate our fellowship with one another. If one doesn’t like the studio principles where they go, just like Church, one can find another that is closer to what they value. If we are against people forcing their religion down other people’s throats, then we can be against the same thing in Yoga. Just walk on and keep YOURSELF free by not judging another’s motives, likes, and dislikes.

WHY am I writing about such things? It’s because it’s everywhere, this judgement, both from religious views and now, Yoga. Teachers are quitting teaching because they are against what they see in the States concerning Yoga. What would we say to a missionary who quits because the Church down the street doesn’t “do it my way”?

Are people needing attention and so this is why they do what they do? Maybe. Maybe not. ” To ones own Master one stands or falls.” We don’t have to see everything EXACTLY the same in order to be FRIENDS.

Yoga and God are for everybody. Let each person find what they need. And if they need to wear colorful clothing or any old thing to their PEW or MAT, let them be. If it’s distracting to someone, then the invitation is to facing the issue that’s yours. Just like a beautiful women who is attractive in Church isn’t HER problem because some guy is distracted by her. It’s distracting if that same beautiful woman starts bouncing up and down and carrying on while everyone else is not, and all attention is drawn HER way and not what everyone else is there for. So, it is in Yoga. When someone else doesn’t follow what the Teacher is displaying but drawing attention to themselves with all kinds of wacky poses no one else can  do, that’s distracting. But the issue is, rather than judge them, pull them aside quietly and ask them to JOIN in the  class you are teaching, not their own. We come to class to JOIN each OTHER just like we do in Church.

Then there is this whole deal of “Christians” can’t call themselves THAT and do Yoga, ( and all that nonsense that’s been going around for years.) It’s time to get over it. ANYONE can do YOGA, and ANYONE can make it their OWN.

Judgment is in the eye of the beholder. When we see it within ourselves, THAT is the place we need to go and deal with it. Who do we think we are to judge another and tell them what they CAN and CAN’T do?

“Let my people go” is an  appropriate statement here. If you don’t agree with something in Religion or Yoga, YOU get to do that. It’s a free country and people are free to think on their own, but don’t make it other people’s issue. Own it as your own. And then work on your OWN heart and motives and you will be too busy to try casting stones or getting logs out of others eyes.

I love Jesus. I love Yoga. I love cool and colorful Yoga clothes.  I love my Yoga studio where I PRACTICE. I love the space in which I teach. I love designing Warrior Posse Designs, “where your message is WEAR you live”. I love Yoga Photo shoots ( freedom shoots we call them) .  I love people. I love LIFE.
12042885_429277843931175_2568937823160557189_nLet’s get on with LIVING our own LIVES abundantly and break free of any molds that have held us back from truly LIVING and experiencing all that God and life has endowed us with. The way to do that? Stop arguing because the POINT in it all is JUST. DO. IT. and The Yamas and Niyamas and God will reveal what’s in your own heart.

BE FREE by letting go of stuff that makes YOU suffer in your own head. Open your heart to life itself and to others so that maybe you can have the “invitation” to speak into their lives having your OWN views but freeing yourself from “OTHER” JUDGEMENT.

When it all comes down to it, both God and Yoga offer a very important thing and that is the NAMASTE’ idea. ” The sweetness, the light, the divine in me acknowledges, bows to, and honors the sweetness, the light, the divine in you.”
Namaste’ ❤



” A person isn’t who they are during the last conversation you had with them, they are who they are throughout the whole relationship” . ~ Rainer Maria Rilki ~

Everywhere, we hear the saying, ” How someone responds is not about YOU, it’s about THEM.” I don’t think this is always true. So often , people do push away others and just don’t want to check their own STUFF, so they shluff it off as the other persons deal.

What is the WHOLE relationship telling you? Has there been silence or distance for a lengthy bit of time? Do you feel ignored and invisible?

To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under Heaven. You’ll know when a relationship is not what’s suppose to happen when there is NO response to your engagement with them and to expect something more is to set oneself up for suffering.

I’ve lived my life often trying TOO hard to be LOVE to everyone so that they FEEL loved by me, but refuse to engage me on any level that MEANS something. I’ve tried to scale their “walls” only to degrade my own self in the “fall” to dishonesty  on the other side.

So…I love the 4 agreements because they cause ME to go a bit deeper and ask, Is this about THEM or ME?” If I’m honest with myself, it can be about either. Truth in the inward being is what I’m after in my own life.

Someone asked me this week about my lack of engagement with them and I’m so honored they took the time to do that and didn’t get caught up in their own ego. Their assumption wasn’t at all true and I appreciate that they respected me enough to approach me so that I could explain. I was being seemingly absent physically, but it had nothing to do with them.


On the other hand, when someone refuses to engage and states that clearly they don’t want engagement or interaction, it is HONORING them to accommodate their request. To WORSHIP means only ONE thing: “To ascribe WORTH to.” When we disengage because someone has asked us to, we are giving them WORTH, their request, WEIGHT. To continue trying to engage them is a lack of worth towards THEM and ourselves.

To love others means to listen to them and accept and honor their path in life. If I say, ” I’m done”, believe me. But if I say “I’m NOT done yet”, I’m telling you the truth. And if I or another is seemingly silent, ask me/them. I’ll tell you the truth, but I can’t say what they will do.

To be impeccable with one’s word means that we will be honest. There MAY be a time to take something personally but only by asking yourself, ” Have I done what I can do to mend this?” And then if you have, move on for BOTH your sakes. To make a further assumption makes you suffer and may be a false judgment of another. Always do your best to find out what’s going on and if the wall is still there, to try to break through it MIGHT be the right thing the FIRST time, but after that…’s called HARASSMENT.
To love another without fail doesn’t mean to chase them or rescue them. It means  to LOVE them and that includes loving yourself as well. Love listens and watches for truth to prevail in the relationship.


Have they asked you to continue in REALationship? Believe them when someone tells you something IF they are able to function in a healthy mental capacity.

” Let my people go”, is a very timely and appropriate statement in many situations. Accept the decision of others as an INVITATION to move on with YOUR life and be committed to JOY. Live out your OWN beliefs while respecting THEIRS.


Staying true to YOUR path and journey will help you to stay open to those who you are to meet along the way. You’ll know when to join in  and when to walk on. Trust the way..

Ancient Words, Ever True….


“Ancient words, ever true, changing me, and changing you, we have come with open hearts, oh, let the ancient words impart”…. ~ Michael W. Smith ~

So often throughout my life, I will rise up early in the morning and immediately upon rising, a sentence or phrase will just pop into my head as though someone audibly spoke it to me out of the blue. Sometimes it would be the line of a song, or a passage of the Bible, or something else profound. Each time it happens it’s pretty amazing to me and I’m overjoyed that my Source finds me attune to hearing. This a.m.I awoke while still dark and the phrase: ” Now you are clean because of what I have told you.” HUH…now that’s odd, I thought. I know that Bible verse so well and today, it is my message. Now, mind you, I don’t ever consider myself “dirty. tainted, or soiled in some way. I live a life of grace that isn’t hung up on thinking about “sin”, or how I’ve failed God or others, EVER. I use to, but not anymore since my journey has led me out of that mentality and into the mindset that God created me and saw that it was GOOD. I don’t dwell on mistakes I’ve made over the years. I know longer think about how I could “do better” for God or how I’m failing my Lord. That is just no longer any part of my thinking. But, I found it a delight and interesting that God would speak to me on this very passage, out of the blue today.166735_435411566535180_998798095_n
I know enough about the way God speaks to me to take it to heart, so I looked up the passage in its context and the whole context is about abiding in Jesus. The word, “ABIDE has many meanings that people don’t think about much. It means to tolerate, to stand without resistance, to bear something challenging etc. But, in relationship to the Bible verse, Jesus is asking his followers to stay constant in their relationship to him. He is telling his disciples to be like a branch connected to a tree. When a branch is cut off from a tree, it begins to die, but when connected, it continues to bear fruit that it was made to bear.
Now, I spent YEARS in Churches that sang songs about the blood of Jesus being the thing that “cleansed” us, but Jesus isn’t saying that here. This was said to his disciples before the cross. He is telling them that the words he has spoken to them are what has made them clean, and that they should continue in HIM, who is speaking those words. This is what is so cool to me about God. You can’t just pin God down with one thing, one statement, ONE dogmatic doctrine. The Source of all life transcends all of that. God wouldn’t allow mankind to  “take hold of Him” as Mary was warned in the garden after the resurrection. ” Don’t hold onto me,” Jesus said to her. WHY? Because he didn’t want her to grip on to some earthy image of God that would be some kind of good luck charm. It’s also noted that it was once said, ” He didn’t give himself to man because he knew what was IN man.” Exactly what Jesus was alluding to with Mary.
This is what my Bible looks like after it’s been read over and over for 48 years. I love my Bible. I indulge it and enjoy it, pouring through hours upon hours because of that love. BUT, I also love even more, the still, small voice of God that transcends the words of a book. Jesus said, ” My sheep hear my voice and won’t listen to another.” I believe that. I believe that God still speaks today and it isn’t always what we THINK. Sometimes, the Source speaks something we aren’t use to hearing because our filters have been corroded by mans interpretations. We instantly think that our God is angry at us rather than just waking us up with a loving word in the morning. And a smile…QUp0WzcizXKrbJuvmI6E7B3hynzpAdCrGGRkpQ8o-Xs

l could  have felt something like guilt this a.m. because my “filter” use to pick that up all the time when something spoke out of the blue and many might think that is what I should be in-tune to today as well, when I received that phrase upon awakening, but instead I felt interest, imagination, delight, and inquisitive musings. I thought about the passages surrounding it, the ones before and after, the context within a Jewish culture of disciples expecting one thing of their Messiah but an altogether thing happening to him in the end. I could FEEL what Jesus was saying to them. He was telling them that they were going to feel very lost, scattered, disappointed, angry, disillusioned at the coming events that surrounded him, but if they would continue on and think back to the words that he had spoken to them, they would understand that they were STILL clean because of them.
Like Peter, I’ve often spoke out of my own rage, defensiveness, and fear. I’ve often had my foot in my mouth replies and quick to cut off someone’s ear who was transgressing on what I gripped tightly in order to feel safe and secure. I haven’t been the model of a meek and quiet woman as others thought I should be.
But, even in all that, that still small voice upon awakening sees me exactly like he always did. Clean. It’s where the WORD made FLESH isn’t something that can ever be leather-bound and boxed in. That’s what man has attempted, and I’m glad we have it in a leather-bound version, but it isn’t God. God still speaks today within it and outside of it. The SPOKEN word moves beyond all barriers and dogmas. It’s fresh and alive and if we are open to hearing, we will hear.

So …thinking deeply about this word, I think of all the words I’ve heard and even the ones I have spoken that immediately “cleansed” someone of something in particular that held them bound.  It was like something I’ve said that released them from a turmoil, law,  a negative lifestyle, anything that didn’t keep them connected to freedom. That’s what words can do. Free us. Cleanse us. Draw us to life. OR, they can have the opposite reaction too.

Love will always cleanse us when we feel like we haven’t “made the grade.”
” Now, You are clean because of what I have told you.”  It’s time to tear the wall down and if it can’t be torn down, at least get over it. Don’t let it hold you back from knowing freedom, cleansing, and life itself. ” You who have ears to hear….HEAR..”
Love will never fail to include us and help us over each thing that keeps us from experiencing it.

IF It is for freedom that we were set free, we don’t need to enter back into slavery, whether it’s someone elses’ words or those we have imputed towards guilt for ourselves.

This journey of saying “YES” to inhabiting my own life with intensity  has me listening a bit more and judging it a lot less. I see the areas I am getting free from and TO. It’s such a sacred journey ……




The Feeling Of Being Home…( in the IN-BETWEEN)


On this 43 day journey into inhabiting my own life, I’ve come across so many forks in the road which always slow me down and invite me to consider my way. Is it this direction? That one? Am I on the straight and narrow or will this lead me astray? So many questions and so very few answers later, I’ve noticed that fear always speaks much louder than wonder. For some reason, wonder isn’t encouraged. It’s like when one wonders, they for sure are not going to go the right way. I’ve been taught for so long not to trust my OWN  inclinations and my own voice so to allow this thing of “wonder” to persist has been  it’s own  thorn, so to speak. If you “WONDER” for sure you would “WANDER” from the straight and narrow path. But, is that true? Does God always want us to make sure we are “safe” at all times from our own selves? If we WONDER will we WANDER? And what would be so wrong with that?

Maybe all of our ducks would lose their place in line?

For 48 years, every morning of my life has been spent sitting in a perfect chair with my Bible, and my notebook. I’d spend hours devouring the book I loved with all of my heart. I grew in knowledge beyond my years and I had always approached it with excitement and wonder, because that book held so many possibilities for not only mine, but everyone’s life I would come across. Yesterday, someone took my Bible in their hand and exclaimed how old and “used” it was, falling apart at the seams. It created “wonder” in me as he talked about it. I mentioned I had been reading it since I was 14 years old. This little experience brought me to one of those moments where you felt like you were “home”. Even though I wasn’t at home, that conversation took me back YEARS and the very first time I got up early in the morning to make my little sacred space, MINE.

The Words always brought joy to my heart as a little hippie chick trying to find her way in the world. I was searching for peace and love at such a young age and that is where I found it. Jesus Christ became my “Superstar”  and though I wasn’t “lost”, I still found that sense of home  that I had been searching for. It was my little girl “aha!” moment that has continued with me today. BUT, somewhere in that journey, I was taught not to wander or wonder. I was taught not to approach that Book with such either. It should be approached with ” systematic theology” rather than imagination. If one used their imagination, they certainly would be picked off, the same idea that if one wondered or wandered from the systematic thinking,  certainly, it would bite you in the butt. I was told that “sheep were stupid” and as a sheep, I needed to be SO careful lest I lose my way completely.

That didn’t happen, though some might think it did. I love the brain and the thought processes it took, and so I had to decide whether I would lose my way or lose my mind. It was a hard decision but I needed to find that sense of “Home” that I had somehow lost early on by giving up my sense of wonder. So…I wandered away from the ducks in the row mentality to made my way home.  It was a long process and I find that gathering speed only held me back. This was a journey that God was taking me on and wanted me to do some “sightseeing” along the way. Special places that I had never seen before, and some that I had missed early on. “SLOW DOWN CHILD”.

Leaving the comfort of my “easy” chair, I set out on my adventure, not sure of where it would take me, but knowing I needed to take it anyway.


What stands in the way of us saying “YES” with intensity and intention to our story, our lives? Sometimes it is most definitely baggage and other times it is people. People with well meaning concerns and beliefs, but nonetheless, often people filled with their own fears and pass them on to you.


I found that when you follow the voice of truth,  it will always give you hints and directions along the way. And whenever I would feel a little lost in the unknowing of it all, I always found those in the most interesting of places. And they always encouraged me to keep going.


I love this journey I’m on “out of fear” and into wonder again. There are so many new sights and people along the way that I would have never encountered if I stayed stuck in what I was told was “safe”.  As a woman, the message was even more restrictive because as a woman it was taught that I would most CERTAINLY be led astray since my “mother of old” had been so.

As a “good” daughter of Eve, I had to forever remain “her” child and never grow up into my “own.”My lessons from her were poignant: “Wonder… and a snake will bite you in the ass and surely you will WANDER away from not only the Sheep fold, but God as well.” Little did I know there were other sheep “not of that fold.”
I did encounter snakes in the grass along my way, but they never bit me and here’s why: I am a woman of wisdom. Remember all those years of getting up early? Remember the Book I devoured and was falling apart at the seams? Remember my “Superstar”? I had many stones of remembrance along the way. They weren’t stones of stumbling as I had been told. Stones of REMEMBRANCE.


I’ve always loved collecting stones and just recently a very good friend mentioned her own “touchstone”. That word stood out to me because of this love for stones, and I am so thankful that HER word meant something for me as well She “lent” it to me for the moment.  That still,  small voice reminded me “Remember the child-like wonder I instilled within you? Remember the sense of awe and delight you had with ME back then? Remember the excitement when you would get up in the wee hours before the dawn to talk together of what I had in store for you?”


What an adventure! Though I’m on the outside of something created by man, I’m on the inside with that which is not. You can’t hold God within any walls whatsoever. One MAY find God there and many do, but God cannot be contained or held back when one wants to experience life.


I am still on this journey and this “in-between” space is like the day in-between Good Friday and The Resurrection Sunday. There are deaths to die along the way and then you know that Sunday always comes when the truth rises again within your heart and stands right before your eyes. So often, you don’t know for sure WHO that is at first, but the voice of truth never changes. It’s inflections and tone are always the same though it might change appearance coming from the tomb. I don’t know where I will be at the end of it, but I know that once upon a time, a man was called forth from the grave named Lazarus. In all those little deaths we die along the way , more than one “rising again” happens.  This one thing I do know. I will always be where …..

Woman To Woman….


LADIES… If we don’t respect OURSELVES… men will never respect us either. Let me tell ya…..LOVE begins with YOU loving YOURSELF first. When we love our SELVES, we don’t grovel or settle for ANYTHING less than we DESERVE. WHAT do we deserve, one might ask? To have boundaries and ALLOW others to have boundaries too. When we allow another person to cross our CLEAR boundaries OR we ALLOW OURSELVES to cross their CLEAR boundaries, it’s disrespect, and NOT love or CARING.( this goes female to female and male to male as well).
It’s unHEALTHY. It’s harassment. It’s STALKING. Yes, I said that right. STALKING. Emotional affair. STOP IT. If he’s not reaching out to YOU, don’t hold out your hand.

WHY do women do this? Because they are NOT YET settled in their OWN heart that they are WORTHY of respect, so they don’t give it to others either. It begins with us LADIES. Don’t settle, because in the settling…you get N.O.T.H.I.N.G.
What does NOTHING do for YOU or GIVE you?
And it’s not at ALL about THE MAN. It’s about US ladies.

When  a man doesn’t want you, he is not asking for your services  either. Don’t OFFER because though he may take you up on the offer, he is not asking you to fall in love with him, nor is he falling in love with YOU.

If they aren’t OURS already, they aren’t GONNA BE. If they said “NO”, NO MEANS “NO” to men TOO.

To be healthy, we need to be HEALED.Come to man in your WHOLENESS. You don’t want half a man? Then don’t be half a woman. Get a grip on YOURSELF.
My name is Teri Undreiner and I have ” been THERE, dumb THAT, and I approve this message.

( said no needy woman EVER ).








My Talisman


Day 5 of my journey into inhabiting my own life.

Talisman: “An article or object that is believed to contain certain sacramental properties. A symbol that became important to the person who believed in it.”

It’s such a wonderful feeling to not rush for five whole days. To allow myself to be present at exactly where I’m at. I’ve had more peace as I’ve embraced the yes of that with such intensity.

Lately, I’ve really been into symbols. I’ve been doing symbolic things and finding something that would symbolize my journey of those doings. Recently, I asked my girl’s group to bring something to dinner that was a symbol of their journeys. It was so awesome to see what they were! I felt like I grew to know them so much deeper. I brought two symbols with me. One was a tiny magnifying glass and the other was a black stone with the word : ” BALANCE”on it. My symbols told the story that in my life, I was always a seeker from early on and in this period of my life, my seeking has been for balance which I felt often alluded me as my life gets so busy. I’ve always been one to search intently for clues, insights, and the deepest meanings possible in something and it has always paid off for me, but hasn’t always been welcomed by others.

I had the strangest dream last night about a little bird that didn’t have a home. Somewhere it had lost it’s parents on it’s journey to learn to fly out of it’s nest. It was a healthy little bird though, as if it knew how to find food and water and to keep itself away from the predators that were around the area. I was amazed to watch this little bird fly around and yet stay close by as well. The thing is, I wanted to find it’s tribe, it’s nest, it’s community of like species, so I went on a search with the little bird in the palm of my hands.


I have always loved images of birds wherever I see them so this was so telling.

The wonderful thing about a seeker of something is that usually they are also a finder. I found two nests in my old family room up on a tall shelf. In one nest there was a baby Kackle, and in the other one were a bunch of little baby sparrows. As I looked at my tiny bird to see which nest it belonged to, I couldn’t really tell because it didn’t look exactly like either species of birds, but I wondered if it would be excepted into their nest,  so I tried both. The parent Kackle came back to the nest and wasn’t thrilled to find another bird in her baby’s nest so she fluffed her wings and my little bird flew out of that next and I caught it. Then, I put it in the sparrows nest and it didn’t seem to fit in there either as it quickly flew out again and I caught it again. It loved being in my hands for some reason and I knew it was safe there even though I wanted it to be a part of the bird world where it really belonged. I decided to leave the bird in the room with both nests and see if it could find it’s own safe place. Then I woke up.


As  I poured my coffee to sit with my reading and my pen in hand to write whatever inspired me, I thought back about my dream and saw it’s resemblance into my own life. I’ve always been a loner of sorts and yet at the same time I am fully sociable as well. I need my own space, but I also need a tribe . As I mused about my dream, I picked up my own worn Bible that was falling apart at the seams, and opened it to the Easter Story and how interesting that I began reading about where Jesus is telling His disciples that His sheep belonged to Him and no one could snatch them out of His hand. He also spoke about no one being able to snatch them out of the Fathers hand either. I knew that my dream was speaking to me in my unconscious state that I was perfectly safe right where I was and and that I was never once out of His hand while on my journey out of the nest. I had always been a seeker since I was probably six years old, and I was always seeking for a place of safety. I thought I had found it for many years but then I was called out from that nest as well.

As I have sat pondering this all of this in the  a.m. I am amazed at how all of my Easters have unfolded, and how my journey always brings me back to my Talisman, my safe place, my tribe within tribes. It speaks to me about the diversity that Is God and yet at the same time the Oneness of God. That place where  we are always right in the palm of Gods hand while we are still learning to grow up and away from our nesting place, only to find it again ,though it’s different. My journey has led me to a place more inclusive, more open, more accepting, unlike the nests in my dream. Though they didn’t want the bird in their nests, the other birds allowed the little one to stay “around”, just not “IN” their own space. I wanted to be one who held everyone sacred where anyone could fit it and feel like they were “HOME”.


So, my 5th day of saying “YES” with INTENSITY. YES to my journey. YES to my flying. YES to INCLUSION. YES to my Talisman.

Sunday’s comin’.



Engaging The “YES” With Intensity


” What keeps us from being fully attentive, from saying “Yes”? I think it’s all the stuff we carry with us.” Patti Digh

Day 4. Yesterday I decided to write a love song of what I would want to say to someone if I loved them. I had to think through my own ideas of love with a “yes” in them. So I began it and I couldn’t finish the song. I decided to put it away and begin again with a clearer brain. I picked it back up this morning and liked what I wrote in the first two verses. The “Bridge” of the song has always been the easiest for me to write. Once, a very good friend said to me, ” Teri, YOU are a bridge for other people, that’s why you love writing the bridges of your songs the best. You take people from one place to another. You help them cross over and that is why you start with the Bridges first.” WOW! I hadn’t realized that. It was a true eye opener to see what kind of life I was living nearly 25 years ago when she said that. But, I hadn’t began this love song with the Bridge, I had began with verses and they flowed pretty easy. Today though, as I finished those verses and have to have a Bridge to bring it all together and sum it up, I am having a hard time with it. Is it because I didn’t start there? Or is it because I don’t know HOW to sum it all up when I fall in love? Could it be because I’ve fallen OUT of love rather than IN deeper? Hmmmmm.

Photo courtesy of Daniel Rotgear.

I decided to go back to thinking about a ceremony I did recently in Sedona for myself. Someone there said that we have to fall in love with ourselves and marry ourselves first so that when another comes along, we understand how to love and marry them. If we don’t love and commit to ourselves IN LOVE and respect, we won’t give it to another either or expect it from them towards us. In this picture above, I’m holding a rock with the word ” LOVE” written in Hebrew. I love the Hebrew language and so it was very fitting. The Hebrew language is a series of word pictures. Pictures don’t lie. That’s why I love them. They are not merely words on paper, they depict life. I needed something to not just be a word on a piece of paper. I needed an image, a symbol that depicted LIFE to me. Rather than hold flowers, I sat among them and held a depiction of life in my hands and offered it to God and myself first, and if I offer it to another, I will know what that means. 429151_471073176284635_643725924_n
photo courtesy of Stephen Sinek..

So, what keeps me from being fully attentive and saying YES? What is the stuff I carry around with me that prevents me from living the life I love and loving the life I live? My practice leads me to a target range and a picture my friend, Steve Sinek took, where I consider what I aim for and what I don’t. How far off do I get when I’m aiming for something? When I say “yes” do I really mean “no” and vice versa?

It comes back to Satya. Being truthful with myself and the things I carry.

Today, I’m going to be thinking a bit deeper about being a bridge to myself and my own ideas about what it is to really love and honor the things that God has placed within my heart. The verses are in place, and how to create a bridge between the stuff I carry and what I really want is challenging. Is the bridge already there within me or do I need to go outside of myself to create it? Can I become the bridge to what I want, myself? I may need to let go of a few things I’m holding on to. Look me! No hands?  No holding on?11260600_431255957066697_6270944239797882710_n
photo courtesy of Kristy Snider..

It’s Monday and I get to ….

Saying “YES” and engaging it with intensity today, and I’m still not rushing it. Kind of like love where only “fools rush in”. Tomorrow I’ll share  as far as I’ve gotten with my song. Maybe there will be a bridge and maybe not. Just for today I will live in the verses with INTENSITY and ENGAGE them right where they are…